Balance & Align
Anyone who knows me well has probably heard me say that I hate the term “hustle” for more reasons than one. Although in more recent years the term has been rebranded under the guise of having drive and ambition, historically speaking, hustling has always had a negative connotation. Because of this rebranding, it is not uncommon to meet people who pride themselves on being a hustler who makes things happen for him/herself. Even prior to COVID-19, having multiple sources/streams of income was not only a growing trend but also becoming more necessary.
I believe that there is a big difference between being a hustler and being one who understands the importance of alignment. To hustle is to operate from a constant state of survival. In survival mode, you often make quick decisions to yield quick results that may or may not produce lasting benefits. Someone who understands the power and importance of alignment is strategic in their planning, and consistent in their execution for the purpose of reaching their ultimate goal or level of success. In the face of desperate circumstances, they are wise enough to know that even in shifting into survival mode, alignment is still necessary.
Lost pets who have shifted into survival mode lose their domestic behaviors and revert back to primal instincts. It is said that even the most well-trained dogs may not respond to commands to “come” neither do they respond upon hearing their name called by their owners. It typically takes some time for them to make that shift back to the mindset of a domesticated pet. In life and in business, I liken those with a hustler mentality to that of a dog incapable of flipping that switch back to “domestic pet”. I realize how harsh that sounds but let’s talk about that.
Losing domestic behaviors like obedience, recognizing and responding appropriately to their name being called, or even proper interpretation of danger versus safety can leave one with a potential threat to the neighborhood much less those in the home. In the same way, an adult functioning from a constant state of survival can be a detriment to their relationships and a hindrance to the success of their life and business ventures. Life happens and sometimes you will find yourself in situations where the pressure is on and decisions need to be made quickly to avoid “danger”. The key here, especially as a Christian, is to balance and align. This is not a one-track process in that you may very well find yourself going back and forth between the two depending on the circumstances. Finding balance between the threat you’re facing and your knowledge of God and His plan for your life are so key. Doing so will allow you to develop level headed strategies that align with His master plan and also prevent you from getting stuck in survival mode like I did.
In the last post I mentioned celebrating seven years in business last month. That is a very big deal as I know of a number of people in various industries who never made it beyond the first year. What I didn’t tell you is that I was stuck in survival mode for six of those seven years. When I moved to Durham County in 2011, I did so for a job working in IT. After two years of praying for the right opportunity, with the right pay, I had found it and it was amazing. Within a month of moving I signed the lease on an 1,100 square foot, two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment. Because of the great pay, I was able to have it fully furnished within about two months. I was even able to be a blessing to a few of my friends during that time. I was truly living my best life and it showed as I managed to lose 30 pounds in about two months time. Fast forward to February 4th of 2013 when I was called in to a meeting with several members of upper management and told that they were going to have to lay me off for reasons that went in one ear and out of the other. For some reason, I was completely at peace as they continued to ramble on about how great an employee I was, how much they would miss me, and blah blah blah. We talked for a few minutes after they broke the news and after I assured them that I understood, I walked to my car where I was met with my belongings. I left that day feeling slightly relieved for some odd reason. I had a few coins saved and had another couple of checks coming so I was sure that I would have time to find another IT job soon.
At the time, I was still a full time cosmetology student in class for 40 hours weekly. In the following week, the school had several salon owners and managers come to observe while we serviced clients and to essentially scout for new hires. I caught the attention of quite a few owners but one in particular seemed to have been really drawn to me. She waited until I completed my service before offering me a job on the spot. I was both shocked and grateful. Her timing couldn’t have been more perfect. She was well aware that I was not licensed yet so I wasn’t sure what I would be doing but without hesitation I accepted her offer and agreed to meet with her at the salon after class. After a couple weeks of working under the table as a part time stylist bringing home about $250 to $300 weekly, reality set in quickly. My savings was beginning to dwindle and I was only bringing in enough money to cover my most basic needs. I had to fight and then wait to be approved for unemployment benefits. Even when I finally got approved, after gassing up my car, paying rent and other bills, I barely had enough money for anything else. I was in class from 9:00 am to 5:00 pm so interviewing for jobs and even attending training would be nearly impossible. What was worse… I couldn’t get hired anywhere. Up until that point, I had been able to easily talk myself into any position for which I interviewed. After submitting over one hundred applications and follow-up emails, I had nothing. Naturally, I shifted into survival mode.
During that nine-month period without full time employment, balancing and aligning was a concept I had no desire with which to acquaint myself. I did a lot of crying and twice as much complaining. Periodically the few friends that were aware of my situation would give me money to help out. My parents and god-parents each paid my rent a few times when I didn’t have the money to do so. All of which I had a hard time accepting, but that’s a post for a later date. Somewhere in the midst of my complaining I had a dream that the owner of the salon offered to give it to me, no catch, no strings attached. Now if that were to happen today, I would certainly recognize how my Father God was trying to set me up nicely. But at the time, I was so blinded by my immediate need for money now I didn’t see what was happening. I was married to the idea that making great money had to come from a typical nine to five job. My ultimate goal had to come packaged a certain way in order to be attainable, or so I thought. Although those commission checks were nowhere near what I was making prior to being laid off, I was practically running that salon. I was hiring and firing, running reports weekly, doing inventory, checking clients out, establishing my own relationships with vendors, all while being the only stylist in the salon. Within a few months the owner offered me the Salon Manager position which would allow me to learn the business while still servicing clients. This “promotion” also came with a 5% increase in my commission rate. By this time, I had graduated from school and taken the state board exam. With forty hours of my time freed up each week, do you know what my prideful, immature self said? “I’m not sure I want to accept that. I really need more money coming in so I’m having to consider other options.” Yeah. In hindsight I could slap myself too.
From February 2013 up until early 2019, I was stuck in survival mode and missed out on some pretty great opportunities among other things. God had shown me a glimpse of His plan and what I had to look forward to and it was playing out right before my eyes. Instead of taking a few moments to assess the whole picture, I found myself hustling from one contract position to the next, each one putting me in no better financial state than the prior. I didn’t recognize it until I snapped out of survival mode years later. If I’m honest, long before I had the dream, I had already thought about how I might renovate the salon space if she ever offered it to me. But after being laid off and watching my income dwindle to an all-time low, I shifted into survival mode without first finding that balance and then aligning my efforts and actions accordingly. As a result, I made a laundry list of avoidable mistakes in business and mismanaged a few personal relationships along the way. I also began to run my salon business from a constant state of survival and have seen and felt the effects of the hustle in my body. Not to mention, I missed out on what could have possibly launched me into the reality I have only recently begun to realize. But God is so faithful that even after all of that He is still causing it all to work together for my good.
My point is this. When you understand God’s purpose for your life, balancing your reality with His plan is what makes aligning your efforts accordingly that much easier, no matter the situation. You will find yourself navigating those seasons of survival both sensibly and in a way that ultimately honors God. You’ll be able to avoid many missteps because you’ll be in tune with His voice and His plan. You’ll also save yourself from having to deal with the regret of realizing that you are the reason why you feel way behind schedule. After understanding the impact of balancing and alignment, my life changed forever. That level of understanding also brought along with it wisdom to take time for rest, recovery, and reflection. It is during those periods of rest and reflection that some of my greatest strategies have been developed… strategies that have allowed me to recover all that hustling caused me to lose.
So no, I don’t hustle. In all things, I simply balance and align.
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